The buzz on alcohol (and other horrible puns) PART 1.

Or, “I judged everyone all the time to feel better about myself.”

images-1Now that I’ve graduated from my “no alcohol allowed” university, I feel like I can actually say (or in this case, type) the word “alcohol” and not get in some sort of trouble. Lee University’s Community Covenant is airtight for all those who attend (as long as you also don’t dance or gossip) and out of all of the issues, alcohol is the biggest battle across the board.

These posts are not meant to be a criticism of the Community Covenant, but rather of a possible side effect of the 4-year restriction—the “No Happy Medium” effect. Either people go unhealthily buck wild with drinking during college/upon entering the “real world” or they abstain & adopt an equally detrimental view of drinking, treating alcohol and those who drink it with disdain & judgment masked as righteousness.

Either/or scenarios are usually never really healthy. Trust me, I was all about them. Spoiler alert, I always chose the judgmental path.

Four years of college really, truly changes you. Rereading my old journal from freshman year is like browsing through a stranger’s diary. One thing’s for sure: 18 year old Kelsy would’ve sorely judged the current me.

I was raised to be elitist and that was really fun, for the most part. I felt special, like I had a secret identity that was bottled up inside of me. I especially felt superior around those who drank. Whenever I’d babysit for other families, I’d always check their fridges and shake my head in despair whenever beer or wine was present. Those poor, poor kids, I’d think.

In college, I had several soapbox speeches prepared for all about how drinking and partying were just acts of desperation and escapism (Sidenote: you know how I feel about parties. I’m just awkward). I’d cite that I had a mantle of leadership and felt like I was too good and too smart to ever drink, as if one sip would forever crumble any future good I could accomplish. I had conversation after conversation with my “worldly” drinking friends, trying to win them back into the light of sobriety and out of the evil clutches of Jagermeister. I tried to change people by molding them into what I thought was a model of virtue—so, like myself, naturally.

Looking back, my judgmental attitude is still so cringeworthy. I was so blind and unloving—you can’t make a difference in any capacity when you’re self-righteous. I turned off a ton of people with my superiority complex towards drinking. That’s not the sign of a true leader. Luckily, I had a few really kind, true friends who saw past that façade and loved me unconditionally, despite the fact I obviously had trouble doing the same.

If you’re reading this and could relate to the paragraph 2 above this one with all of the soapbox speeches, just say no! Judgement does not offer freedom. It will master you without hesitation (and it’s a lot harder to detect.)

And really…drinking’s not that big of a deal. Certainly not as bad as I made it out to be (In excess, yes—that’s unhealthy, unbiblical, and 100% escapism. But more on that in Part II.) Alcohol is taboo not because of the Bible, but rather, the last 150 or so years or American prohibitionist history*. (Trust me, I studied advertising.)For me, my attitude was more poisonous than any sort of drink. I’m thankful for the wake up call I received that’s continuously helped me realize that the real problem was the judgment in my heart.

(*Part II coming soon: Why drinking isn’t unbiblical, just controversial)

What I NEVER want to hear again post-graduation:

Sorry for the week hiatus, y’all! The past week has been absolutely chaotic and messy, as I was pretty much living out of my car & my generous friends’ living rooms. But despite all this, I just graduated from COLLEGE this weekend, no big deal!  

ImageThere’s really only twos thing I never hope to hear ever again:

1) When people say they “gradumacated.” Ugh. Seriously? Not cute. (NEVER cute.)

2) “Finals are coming.” Praise God, never again (until grad school.) 



Confessions of a Greek Alumna: or, the expose two years in the making

(Well, this is sad. I just realized that this is the last post I’ll ever write about Greek Clubs. It’s been a very consistently entertaining topic the past two and a half years, providing posts like  5 types of Greek Guys You’ll Meet, the same thing for Greek girls, and Everyone Hates Greek Clubs.)

Tap Night 2011. Little did I know...literally.

Tap Night 2011. Little did I know…literally.

Four semesters ago, I was the epitome of  two things.

The first: cluelessness. Before coming to Lee, I knew that I wanted to rush a club and be a part of the “sorority” scene but upon arrival, became quickly caught up with a different group of friends, ones who would stay up until curfew debating theology, politics, and morality in the Jazzman’s patio. Their name? Kairos (the honors academic club, for everyone unaware). Right away I found a group that loved me, held thoughtful and intellectual discussions, and appreciated my opinions. I loved it.

Part of me still wanted to rush, so much to the chargin of my honors friends, I finally mustered up enough courage to try. I knew literally three people in the entire Greek world and chose to rush Omega based on a tally chart I made during Humanities class one day. The odds were in my favor, so I decided. I was still a little cynical about the whole thing, so I thought that no matter what, I would be so cool and write a hardhitting expose on Greek inductions and rush process. Labeling things as “social experiments” makes all of your anti-Greek friends a little more accepting of the idea.

Naturally, I knew NOTHING about inductions. Literally….nothing. I thought they called you during tap night and then you all had a celebratory dinner at tap night reception. 

…No. To this very day, my Induction Chair still intimidates me. Note to future people rushing: laughing is a bad, bad strategy.

The second thing I epitomized four semesters ago was loneliness. Sure, I had friends but due to a really tough fall semester, I was really struggling with heavy things, such as depression.  I remember sitting on my bed crying, and I told myself that day that I was going to muster up the courage to rush. I didn’t know how much I needed Omega (and realized that every semester since.) I had groups of friends who loved me, but I needed a family at Lee: people who didn’t just love me for what I brought to the table, but loved me even when I was empty handed and brokenhearted.

But anyways, fast forward unto now. I just took my plaque and the timing was perfect. Although I loved the last two years and would redo it all in a heartbeat, I will not miss contrived relationships, forced authority, and club drama, all of which are inevitable with large bodies of people. Despite some sour and toxic people in the Greek system, there are people who are true treasures and some of the greatest friends, influencers, accountability partners, and world changers I have ever met.

So, here’s the real deal on Greek clubs. Bound by antiquated stigmas and stereotypes, the Lee Greek system of 2012 is fighting for unity and community restoration, and in my opinion, is nearer to the goal now than ever before.

  • If you’re rushing sometime in the future, ignorance is bliss. Also, don’t sweat too much because that is so annoying. Be yourself, make them laugh/cry in your interview, blah blah blah.
  • If you rushed and were rejected, honestly, it’s nothing against you, but more about timing. It takes so much courage to put yourself out there to a group of relative strangers–you should be so proud of yourself! It’s okay to be upset, but don’t foster bitterness. Maybe something in your life was supposed to happen that semester instead of that club?
  • If you’ve met someone particularly awful in a Greek club and thus judge everyone by him/her, shame on you. There are horrible people in Greek clubs–fake people, leeches, selfish people, shallow jerks, you name it. But trust me, they are not unique to Greek systems. There are also some of the sweetest, most selfless, kindhearted, loving people you’ll ever meet. Life’s what you make it and the company you choose defines that as well.
  • And finally, for those still in Greek clubs, remember that this isn’t real life. The intramural games, the events, the endless pictures, they’ll end in college. However, the way that you treat others is real life. Maya Angelou once said, At the end of the day people won’t remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.” Let’s remember that.

So, that about wraps up my expose. What, did you think I was actually going to tell secrets? Please. While I’ve never been the biggest fan of the system itself, I have too much respect for the people in it. Duh.

5 Relationship Types at Lee University

Let’s be honest: I love making fun of the Lee University subculture. When I leave, I’m definitely going to experience a blog identity crisis because who will I write about anymore? I’ll just have to incorporate these past four years into a TV pilot or funny memoir.  (Or just start attending the seminary down the street. I’ve heard it’s #PHENOM.)

Has anyone else noticed the amount of new relationships across Lee’s campus these days? It’s downright excessive. With all the “talking” that’s going around, you’d think we lived in an episode of “Christian Gossip Girl.”  While the phenomenon of talking and ring by spring seems typical to the Christian college circuit, Lee University also typifies these 5 classic relationship models.

 NOTE: Any resemblance to real couples, still dating or not, isn’t coincidental at all, actually. But don’t try to assign yourselves to a model because I will not admit the truth.

If only they were FBO…

1. The “They’re dating?!” couple: Call me old-fashioned, but a FBO (Facebook Official) status is vital these days. Why wouldn’t you want to declare that you’re off the market to your 864 friends, keeping creepy guys or obsessive girls from preying on you? The “They’re dating!?” couple is obviously not FBO and is rarely actually seen together. You typically find out that Sally & Joe are not only dating, but have been together for 2.4 years…when they get engaged. Moral: Being enigmatic about your relationship status is so 2010. Continue reading

5 Types of Girls in LeeU Greek Clubs

Don’t kill me, ghosts of TKO members past, but this is literally one of the first images that popped up when I searched “Lee University Greek Clubs.”

If you are or ever were a Lee University student, two words can either inspire fond memories or your gag reflex: Greek Clubs. Love them or hate them, they exist (and are actually fantastic when properly run) & will probably die off on the same day Lee installs an on-campus Starbucks or parking garage (So, never.)

A year ago, when I joined mine, I had no earthly clue about any of the Greek subculture; I didn’t even know about inductions. (Yeah. I was that out of it. Imagine a Disney character going into a coal mine. …Okay, weird metaphor.) However, the more & more acquainted I became with the system, the more I realized that, hey, there’s a big pattern in all of this.

The pattern is this: Everyone is the SAME. Yes, there are a few types of personalities that will always & have always been involved in Greek Clubs. No matter when or what club, my theory is that these people are current members:

Disclaimer: Any resemblance to any person living or dead is purely coincidental.

Continue reading