Rejection Theory (or how to make job hunting less horrible)

rejectionmediumMy least favorite state is Rejection. (Or Arkansas. That’s a pretty boring state to drive though.)

For the majority of my life, this hypersensitivity to rejection has practically crippled me–keeping me from fully participating in life, to say the least. I was so afraid of not being good enough or being someone’s last pick, that I even got a tattoo about it!

I worked SO hard during college to not give anyone any reason to toss me to the side. I tried to always have perfect outfits, look cute all the time, be the favorite employee, work the hardest, be the best in class, be the most liked (–well, to be honest, I never tried to be the nicest person. I definitely fell short on that–sorry everyone who I accidentally made cry. ) It was exhausting and lonely, but I didn’t really notice. I was too busy.

Oh how the tables have changed.

During the past four months I’ve been home, God has really been doing a number on me with this whole “crippling fear of rejection” thing. I’ve been rejected from SO many awesome jobs, a friend who was my very best friend earlier this year, and a few other painful experiences. I felt like a total loser in the beginning, as if my worth was just in what I did.

 I’m no longer afraid. I’ve realized that in life, there’s a finite level of rejection a person has to encounter. Each rejection is just one less the grand sum!

Today I interviewed at a company I would absolutely love to work for. Will I get the job? I have no idea. BUT I do know that if this is a “no,” I’m just one step closer to my “yes!” God bless the broken road that leads me straight to… this job!

I’m glad this has been a summer of rejection. I needed it. If I would’ve gotten a job right away, I wouldn’t have begun to conquer this fear, nor would I have experienced a deeper level of trust in God and His faithfulness.

He is for me–God’s on my team! Rejection is just a change of direction when the Lord’s the one guiding your path.  If you’re going through the same thing, remember that this “no” isn’t the end.

Isaiah 41:9, “I have called you back from the ends of the earth, saying, “You are my servant.” For I have chosen you and will not throw you away!”

Interviewing for a Job, as told by gifs.

When I graduated (a mere 75 days ago, but who’s counting?), I honestly didn’t think finding a job would take such a long time. I imagined that like the magical boomerang, I’d just have to send out my resume and maybe an application once, and then BAM. Something would fly right into my lap on the first try. anigif_enhanced-buzz-12707-1367877643-0

Well, that hasn’t happened. I’ve applied for dozens of jobs, sent out my resume to every agency in town, got an agent (yeah, I know), and even had to fend away a couple of pyramid schemes (which was something that Google, not LeeU, helped me recognize). Along the way, I’ve had quite a few phone interviews and some in person interviews (the holy grail of interviews). (I almost had to Skype interview once, but thank God that was cancelled. Skype freaks me out.)

Except the guy in this scenario is a job here in Nashville.

Except the guy in this scenario is a job here in Nashville.

Job hunting is not fun. Like, crazy not fun. I’ve heard it said that while unemployed, finding a job IS your job, which makes it the least desired job in the world, right after being Nicolas Cage’s hair stylist. The past 75 days haven’t been easy, but I’ve been learning a lot about myself, life, God, everything, etc, so this time has been meaningful. I’ve been also able to freelance on several awesome projects, which helps too!

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Aren’t interviews the best though? They’re like Sonic Happy Hour drinks after a long day driving in a car without AC or windows that go down (yeah, that’s my car): refreshing to the spirit. FINALLY someone replies back to the thousands of emails you send or applications submitted into the big, black void of the Internet. You’re on top of the world again! You’re ready to bring your A game & get that job!anigif_enhanced-buzz-24900-1366767851-3

Phone interviews are always somewhat awkward though, as you can’t see the other person react & gauge your responses to their body language. They’re always a bit tough for intuitive, “I talk with my hands all the time” communicators. One time on an interview, I could tell that they put me on speakerphone & then muted their end when I was talking, which was kind of intimidating. Like, you know they’re talking about you, but you can’t really do anything about it…anigif_enhanced-buzz-712-1366773375-16

In person interviews are my favorite too because I love to dress up for them (dress to impress!) and also try my absolute hardest to gain rapport with my interviewer. (In spite of the small talk with the receptionist or security guard as I wait for the interviewer to come to the lobby.)  tumblr_m5fskqiRZu1rqtw44o1_500

But all the rapport and jokes in the world can’t make up for THE WORST QUESTIONS EVER ASKED. God forbid you ever deal with this & just have nice, totally normal questions.

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Oh yes. The double questions. The ones when the interviewer wants you to admit something horrible or further prove that you actually don’t know anything about the job/skills/company. Sometimes I’ve caught them & saved myself, sometimes…no. anigif_enhanced-buzz-4193-1371488698-2

There’s always that turning point in an interview when you just KNOW it’s too far gone to rescue & that you will not be asked back for another interview. That’s happened to me before (usually I’m super confident in all my interviews) and  I was totally correct–didn’t get the job.

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But despite the rejection from some jobs, I’m not too torn up. Obviously, those weren’t the places God had me to be! There’s a finite amount of rejection in a person’s life–with each one, there’ll only be less to deal with! All these “no”s are just leading me to my “yes.”

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Back to the job hunt!

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Job Hunting, as told by gifs

Well, I’ve officially been out of college for 9 days.

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What have I been doing on this glorious self-proclaimed vacation week? Obviously not blogging, whoops.

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Basically, I’ve been living a life Liz Lemon would be proud of. Sleeping, watching all of the seasons of “Community,” and eating. I love food and laziness. This series of gifs = post-grad life thus far. Watch out, a life this fabulous is contagious.

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But now that my vacation week is over, I’ve been having the bad feeling that maybe…somehow…perhaps…I need to find a real job. Cue ominous music.  

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People in town are starting to ask questions that I just can’t answer…questions like:

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And I’m just like…

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Another reason I need a job is because every time I pull up my bank account, I die a little.

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Job hunting is such a weird way to describe finding a job. It’s honestly like the Hunger Games. I have to choose which career path to pursue (curse you, abstract Communications Studies degree!) and hope the odds are in my favor! So, phase 1 of job hunting is of course self-actualization. anigif_enhanced-buzz-32541-1366772301-14

I just want to do work that is meaningful and makes me excited everyday to spend my time doing it. Like this adventurous corgi—he knows what’s up:

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May we all be like this dog.